I was in El Salvador last week working on a church. We mixed and poured 25 meters of cement... by hand. We put up nearly 30 sheets of tin on the roof (I personally put around 1,000 screws into that tin). And, on top of that, it was over 100 degrees every day.
Several of our team got sick, and I was one of them. Not to be too big of a baby, but I lay awake on Tuesday night, into Wednesday morning praying to puke. During a miserable night of sickness, I was dreading getting up and going to stand on that hot tin roof and drive screws into it. At that moment, just about anything would have been better.
That morning, I woke up and read Psalm 22. It starts with those words that Jesus said from the cross, "My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?" It goes on to describe in detail crucifixion, although it would not be invented as a form of death for nearly a thousand years later.
The verse that captured my attention was, "My heart has turned to wax, it has melted away within me." That was how I felt... like shapeless wax, melting away. But I remember praying, "God, if you have to let me suffer this for someone to know you, I will."
Later on Wednesday, I had a chance to talk to Jose for about 2 hours as I shoveled sand into 5 gallon buckets. It was refreshing, renewing, invigorating. I didn't even know I was sick as I shared with him the love of Jesus and God's purpose for his life.
My heart melted, but even in the worst moments of that trip, I made the strongest impact. So, if you are melting... stand firm, because God can use you in your weakest point to make the biggest difference.
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